Knowing how each other will react in different situations and responding in the right way is a cornerstone of a strong partnership. When you’re upset, they know how to lift your mood. When you’re overwhelmed, they know how to calm you — and you do the same for them.
With the right person, you naturally fall into each other’s rhythms, habits, and little quirks. Comfort around them is a big clue — you stop guarding yourself. For example, you may let go of long-held body-image worries because their acceptance helps you accept yourself.
2. You share the same vision for the future
A marriage is hard to build if you don’t agree on the big-picture stuff. Talking early on about what marriage means to each of you and where you see your lives heading — children, where you’ll live, how you’ll balance work and home — is essential.
When you’re with the right person, your individual goals and your shared goals line up in ways that make merging lives possible. That alignment also helps you learn more about one another and plan together.
3. You don’t hold grudges
After a fight, you both say what you need to, take time to cool off, and genuinely move forward. Holding onto leftover resentment makes it impossible to make progress.
With the right partner, disagreements don’t spiral into long-term damage. You both take steps to resolve issues and really try to see the other person’s point of view.
4. Your friends and family see what you see
The people who know you best usually want what’s best for you — so if they can’t get along with your partner, take note. When your private view of someone differs sharply from the way your loved ones experience them, it’s worth asking why that’s happening.
Love can blind us to red flags, so trusted friends and family can offer useful perspective. When you’ve found the right person, your social circle will generally warm to them — and you’ll feel that same compatibility.
5. You actively challenge each other to be better
You both want to grow — as individuals and as partners — and you root for each other in meaningful ways. Challenging one another isn’t just talk; it’s shown through actions that prove you care and want to see each other improve.
The right partner knows your strengths and pushes you to use them. A healthy relationship has honest conversations, gentle accountability, and ongoing encouragement whenever one of you takes on something important. As Christiana Njoku, LPC, puts it, being with someone who pushes you to become a better version of yourself is a sign you’re with the right person.
6. You can both be your authentic selves
This one’s simple: the right person accepts you — the real you. When you’ve found the right partner, you feel free to show your full personality, your sense of humor, your flaws and your strengths. They feel the same way around you.
In the video below, relationship expert Rachel DeAlto talks about how people wear masks that keep them from being their best selves. Watching ideas like hers can help you recognize whether you and your partner are being fully authentic with one another.
7. You just know
How do you know you’ve found the one? If you’re constantly questioning the relationship and stuck fixing the same issues, it’s time to look deeper. Not every doubt means the relationship is doomed, but you are the best judge of how it feels.
Sometimes everything simply clicks — and you get that quiet certainty that this is the person you want to spend your life with.
A marriage is a promise between two people to be there for each other, and it’s normal to wrestle with doubts now and then. Relationship coaching can create a neutral place where both of you can speak openly and get professional guidance that understands the ups and downs of long-term commitment.
