Your palms are sweaty, your heart’s racing, and your thoughts are all over the place as you try to say and do everything just right.
It might only be a first date, but you’re a bundle of nerves, overthinking every word and gesture because you want to make the best possible impression. And honestly? That’s completely normal.
Many first-time daters even turn to Google before their big night, searching for things like “how to make a great impression on a first date” or “what not to do on your first date.” It’s just their way of trying to get everything right—from choosing the right outfit to knowing what to talk about.
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Feeling anxious before a first date is perfectly natural, especially when you’re meeting someone who could end up being an important part of your life. The tricky part is that nerves can sometimes make you say or do things you normally wouldn’t.
That’s where we come in. Here’s a helpful guide to nine common mistakes to avoid on your first date—so you can relax, be yourself, and actually enjoy it.
1. Don’t Forget Your Manners
They say chivalry is dead—but you don’t have to prove that true.
Simple acts like holding the door open, saying “please” and “thank you,” and chewing with your mouth closed can go a long way. Good manners aren’t just about impressing your date—they show respect for everyone around you.
Pay attention to how you treat the staff at the restaurant or café, too. Believe it or not, your date will notice how you interact with others even more than how you treat them directly. Rudeness toward servers is one of the quickest ways to make a bad impression.
2. Don’t Skimp on Personal Hygiene
First impressions truly matter—especially when there might not be a second chance.
Before heading out, make sure you’re fresh, clean, and well-groomed. Take a shower, brush your teeth, wear clean clothes, and maybe even spritz on a little fragrance.
Treat your first date like a special occasion. After all, this could be the start of something meaningful—so it’s worth the extra effort.
3. Don’t Make It All About You
When you’re nervous, it’s easy to fill every silence by talking non-stop about yourself. But that’s one of the biggest mistakes you can make on a first date.
Remember, your date wants to share their story too. Ask them questions, listen actively, and show genuine curiosity about their life and experiences.
A good rule of thumb: keep the conversation balanced. Talk, listen, and engage equally so both of you walk away feeling heard and connected.
4. Let Them Speak for Themselves
Interrupting or speaking over your date is one of the quickest ways to come across as dismissive.
Don’t order food for them unless they specifically ask you to, and never answer questions meant for them. Allow your date to express their opinions—it shows respect and interest.
Listening is just as important as talking, and it’s a key part of building mutual understanding.
5. Don’t Comment on Their Eating Habits
Whether your date orders a full meal or just picks at a salad, don’t bring attention to it.
Avoid remarks like “You’re eating so little!” or “Wow, you have a big appetite!” These comments can make people feel uncomfortable and self-conscious.
Instead, focus on whether they seem to enjoy the food. If they do, you can note that for next time and plan a follow-up date at a similar place—but keep your observations to yourself for now.
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6. Don’t Overdo the Drinks
It’s common for people to rely on a bit of “liquid courage” to ease first-date jitters. One or two drinks are fine—but know your limits.
Getting drunk can make you say things you didn’t intend to or behave in ways that don’t represent you well. It also blurs your judgment and can send the wrong signal.
No one enjoys a date who’s slurring their words or struggling to stay awake. And remember—never leave your drink unattended, no matter how trustworthy your date seems.
7. Don’t Bring Up Your Ex
This one’s a classic rule for a reason: do not talk about your ex.
No matter how your last relationship ended, leave it in the past. Mentioning an ex can make it seem like you’re still emotionally attached or comparing your date to them—and that’s a surefire way to kill the vibe.
Keep the focus on the person in front of you, not the one behind you.
8. Avoid Criticizing Their Outfit
Maybe your date shows up in jeans and sneakers when you expected something dressier—or they’re in heels when you thought it’d be casual. Whatever the case, don’t comment negatively on their clothes.
They might have chosen that outfit for comfort, confidence, or even practicality. The last thing anyone wants is to feel judged for what they’re wearing.
Instead, appreciate the effort they made to show up and spend time with you—that matters far more than what they’re wearing.
9. Don’t Judge Their Makeup (or Lack of It)
Whether someone wears a bold red lip, a bit of foundation, or no makeup at all, it’s their personal choice.
Comments like “You don’t need makeup” or “That’s a lot of eyeliner” can come across as rude or condescending. Everyone has their own comfort zone and way of presenting themselves—and it’s not about pleasing you.
Be kind, be respectful, and focus on their personality rather than their appearance.
A Final Word
Feeling anxious before a first date isn’t a crime—it’s actually a sign that you care. You’re meeting someone new, hoping it might lead to something special, and naturally you don’t want to mess it up.
